Of Catch-22's and Being a Woman

This post is a little different from my usual post, but it is something that has been bothering me recently. Readers, please bear with me. I will be back to normal posts afterwards. Don't feel obligated to read, I just have to rant for a moment.
It seems to be that women are highly judged and scrutinized in our society. Many of these judgements seem to place us in a Catch-22 situation. Recently, there has been a lot of scrutiny on Stephanie Meyer (Twilight series), for writing a lead character who is such a bad example of feminism. How dare she write a character that **gasp**, chose to get married at 18. Such a bad example for young women today, tsk tsk tsk. Anyone who has known me for, oh, around 8 years would know how I feel about getting married at 18. Feminists all around, well Utah at least, are in an uproar over this. Women should not be choosing marriage and children, they should be choosing careers and personal success, or so they believe.
John McCain's running mate has also created an uproar, but not for the reasons one would think. The big uproar is not over political differences, but over whether or not she should be at home instead of in the white house. Many people look at her daughter's failures as a reflection Palin's failure to raise her properly. Others claim that, with her family struggles, she needs to be home with her children, and not pursuing a career. What really bothers me with these statements, is that I've very rarely, if ever, hear the same arguments being made against a male candidate. In fact, many praised Governor Huntsman when he adopted a child from another country. That is a situation that requires strong parental presence in order to help the child adapt to a new country. However, nobody doubted the Huntsman's ability to help the child adapt.
Now, I have my own personal opinions on Palin, and what I would choose to do in her situation. Personally, I dream of being a stay at home mother. Please don't take this post as me saying that I think women all belong in the workplace. What I am saying is that, why do we tear down other women's choices so much? Wasn't the purpose behind the feminist movement to allow women choice and be given equal rights? Who is to say what choice is best for a family, but the heads of that family? If a person chooses to marry young, as I did, is that person not entitled to get married? If a person chooses a career, are they not also allowed to pursue that career? It seems to me that we as women can be our own worst enemies. I for one, would like to see us support other's choices, and truly be sisters to each other.